Friday, December 16, 2011

Turning 30...and what my 20's taught me and what I am looking forward to

So this past July I turned 30....can't believe it. I hear the 30's are suppose to be super awesome, I hope so. The 20's were such a crazy time. Soooo much change!

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The 20's teach us so much about ourselves.
They make us strong.
We navigate new and scary/exciting experiences, and hopefully come out of those experiences better and more mature.
We learn who we are, we become our real selves.
The 20's are a time of so much opportunity, the world is open to us.
We are young and can be spontaneous!
You want to go live in a new city? DO IT!
You want to dye your hair a crazy color? DO IT!
Go study a new major? DO IT!
Take a trip abroad? DO IT!
Drive cross country? DO IT!

The 20's was all about taking risks and hoping they payed off. And learning from our failures.

What did I do in my 20's? Let's take a look.

2001 - Age 20 - had a less than stellar experience in college as an English major. Flunked out.
2002 - Age 21 - realized I really wanted to study fashion. Went to Italy and studied fashion design. Fell madly in love with an Italian man named Giovanni. Realized I didn't like fashion design, wanted to pursue more editorial side of fashion.
2003 - Age 22 - started school for a degree in Fashion Merchandising. Fell in love with a boy named Cory, had my heart smashed to pieces. Began a long journey of finding power and destruction in my sexuality. Met an amazing group of guy friends.
2004 - Age 23 - took a fashion school trip to NYC, where I learned I really loved big cities. Many stupid and courageous leaps with my heart. Fell head over heels for an engaged man, who I never told him I loved him, and had my heart torn apart when he left.
2005 - Age 24 - Dated a guy who was sweet, romantic, loving, thought I was beautiful, but also extremely jealous. I learned that that kind of guy sounds nice in a song, but in real life, too much for me. I interned at a fashion magazine in Houston...loved it. Graduated with my Associates in Fashion Merchandising.
2006 - Age 25 - Floundered a bit in life. Worked in retail mostly. Looked into and began the application process to go to school in Los Angeles. True beginning of the realization that all the meaningless hook ups and men in my life wasn't fun anymore. Truly not happiness.
2007 - Age 26 - Drove with my bestfriend to L.A. Began school at FIDM. Realized that staying friends with guys doesn't always work when they have a jealous wife. Started volunteering for as many fashion/film events I could. Dressed the cast for a friend's commercial. Realized I wanted to work in the film industry in costuming and wardrobe. Drove onto my first back lot for a film event. AMAZING! Dressed models for Mercedes Benz Fashion Week. Made amazing friends with a new group of guys. Realized a guy from my past was toxic and using me.
2008 - Age 27 - Styled my first editorial spread for ELIZA Magazine. Assisted various stylists on photo shoots. Got kicked out of a crazy stylist's house. Worked in retail. Was horribly broke and had to get help from family and church....sooo humbling, and eternally grateful for that help. Interviewed with the costume department for HBO's show True Blood, they loved me. Then was told corporate couldn't afford the liability insurance for me to be a free intern! CRUSHED! Spent my first Christmas away from my family. Realized I would be ok.
2009 - Age 28 - Got fired from my job, with no time to get a new one and pay rent. Realized I needed to move back to Texas. That was hard. Drove back across country to Texas with bestfriend, got lost and REALLY learned how to read a map! Don't trust mapquest! lol Moved back in with my parents. Floundered. Was seriously depressed. Took old job back. Decided to get back on track with my spirituality and church. Met a man who made me giddy. Let him pursue me. Went to Vegas with him. Told him "I love you" first.
2010 - Age - 29 - Took the next step with my spirituality, went through the temple. Love of my life proposed. Learned a lot planning a wedding with my mom. Had to reevaluate what I truly want from my life and work. Had an amazingly fun wedding. Realized that sometimes you just have to say things how they really are. Decided last minute that Texas might not be where we would end up. Sent hubbby off to find work in Elko.
2011 - Age 29/30 - Moved off to an unknown future with the man I love.

My 20's taught me to be more assertive, to speak my mind and be extremely honest. To go for what I want and take risks and be adaptable. I learned that my worth is not dependent on what anyone thinks of me, especially men. I learned friends come and go, and that's ok. My religion is something I truly believe and gives me purpose and joy. I am a very different person now than I was at 20. I like who I have become.

For my 30's I look forward to growing in marriage with my husband. I want to grow in my spirituality and understanding of the gospel. I want to have kids and learn from them. My 30's will have sadness and joys, they will be crazy and amazing. I look forward to it all. Except maybe the wrinkles!

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